Important Disclaimer

Since I currently have several employers/supervisors/churches/etc., please know that none of the words on my blog represent them or their beliefs. This blog is my own creation.

It also does not represent my children's perspective, nor my mother's; they think I am funny, but misguided.
(Quick update: only my mother thinks I'm funny now.)

Wednesday, December 5, 2012

Advent Foolishness: Love


"The Court Jester"

P.B. Avery & Wallace Jones
It seems that I may
be all mixed up 
about
Advent
which
would be nothing new at all.
Possibly last week was love
and this week was hope
but I blogged about joy as hope
and is this week the week of the special purple candle or is that next?
or is it a special pink candle?
or are they all pink candles and there's one blue one?

i didn't grow up in a church

three years of pastoring a church didn't stick any better. clearly.

once, when I was new to working at a church,
I arrived early
--astonishing, I know--
and I noticed
that 
the candles were not yet lit.
This concerned me greatly.
so
I
lit 
them.
Horrified, the church office manager blew them out.
But now we needed
new
candles
because the idea is that we don't light the candles until that particular week.

Once,
at a Maundy Thursday service
--although it may have been called a Tenebrae
or a Service of Shadows
or some such--
and this was recently, too
in April this year, actually,
I blew out the last candle
because it seemed the thing to do
but it apparently wasn't
because when
the service
was over
the pastor said,
"Who blew out my candle????"
Oops.

Apparently I have a thing with candles.

I don't have much patience with my joy
I
am
an
immediate
gratification
kind
of
joy
person.

Willing to bet some of you are too, and so this nonsensical breaking up of lines and never getting to the point is probably annoying the joy right out of you.

They say we should think of Mary this week
patient
pregnant
poignant
and all that.
I was a terrible pregnant
woman.
impatient
nauseous
--for nine months straight--
unpleasant.
I sympathized most
with Sigourney Weaver
in Alien
waiting for the creature
to hatch
and claw its way out.

I don't wait well.

Joy! Joy! I am already there
I have lit
the candles
and
blown them out
Done! Done! I tell you
Let us be done
and on to the New Year
Let the sparks fly

In 2012
my New Year's Resolution
was 
I will not
fold
my children's
boxers.

I stuck to it, I did!
Only once did I pause
after turning
the boxers
right
side
out
But I paused
crumpled them up
and
threw them in the pile.

Because who wants
to spend their time
folding underwear?

Only now do I realize
that I keep trying to blog
about
joy
when I think
this week is supposed to be love.

Well what's the difference anyway?
To love is to sink into joy.
To joy is to sink into love.

I think joy should be a verb.

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