Important Disclaimer

Since I currently have several employers/supervisors/churches/etc., please know that none of the words on my blog represent them or their beliefs. This blog is my own creation.

It also does not represent my children's perspective, nor my mother's; they think I am funny, but misguided.
(Quick update: only my mother thinks I'm funny now.)

Monday, October 6, 2014

Vigil

I sat vigil tonight for our community
no homicides since July 30
the longest stretch of quiet 
since May 2012
nobody else came
but I don't mind
I sat and prayed
anyway
and sang
I sang hymns
and crocheted a scarf
and I prayed
for the children
for women and men
in Trenton
for my children
for myself

     I sat vigil in our small chapel
     and it doesn't matter that I was alone
     if there's anything I've learned as a mother
     it's that sometimes
     as the sun goes down

     that you sit vigil alone
     watching over babies and loved ones
     who don't know or care that you watch

          I had a wry moment
          looking at the picture of myself
          in the dark
          rocking
          crocheting
          making soup
          praying
          singing hymns
          my arthritis aching in the chill air
          a village auntie I am becoming

               it isn't enough
               but it's something
               the church doors were open
               there was prayer
               in the chapel where Beloved has prayed for me
               and afterward I had chicken soup
               chicken soup is something

I knitted together the tangled threads
of yarn the way
I imagine
the Almighty knitted each of us
in our mother's womb
bone by bone
sinew by sinew
each knot written in the book of days
like each breath is also
not promised
but gifted

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